


Death from Within

by RemyWrites



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Death, Drowning, Gen, Gore, Heavy Angst, Human AU, Imaginary Friends, Spiders, implied suicide, triggering
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-19
Updated: 2018-11-05
Packaged: 2019-08-04 11:44:39
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 3,540
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16346093
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RemyWrites/pseuds/RemyWrites
Summary: Virgil felt like he was being watched. No matter what he did, he couldn’t shake the feeling. One day he heard a scratching behind him. When he turned around, he saw his imaginary friend from when he was a kid. Virgil watched as he dissolved, leaving only a note that said “get me out of here.”Logan had been numb to emotions for so long. Why was he all of a sudden feeling an ache in his heart? He heard a voice in his head that he hadn’t heard in years. “Help me.”





	1. Living Nightmare

In my sleep, vast new worlds spread out before my eyes. In some, green grass and wildflowers covered the ground in bright colors in others, everywhere you stepped was asphalt or cement. I could raise mountains and destroy cities with a simple thought the very power of creation was held within my fingertips and the spark of imagination burned within my soul. I was sovereign and no one could rise against my command. I led armies to defeat great monsters. I saved nations from doom and despair. 

Tonight was no different. The red tinted air smelled like strawberries, and the grass beneath my feet was soft as marshmallows. The army behind me prepared for battle as the greatest evil I had ever fought loomed before me. The monstrous beast had bloodred scales. It’s milk white wings were thin, but powerful, with viscous, hooked spines protruding from the edges. Twisted horns crowned its head, blood dripping from the golden bone 

As I drew my sword, it let out a roar that would cause most men’s blood to run cold in their veins. I roared my own battle cry in response, charging it with every ounce of strength and speed I could muster. The hordes of knights behind me were quick to follow their prince. Every attack we made only angered the beast. It’s claws ripped through the white silk of my uniform, digging into my shoulders. I felt my muscles being sliced in half as excruciating pain shot through my body. Adrenaline wasn’t enough to mask the ache. 

The creature spread its massive wings, lifting me into the air. Every movement the beast made ripped through my shoulders. I refused to scream. My army would not know that I was in pain. They needed to keep up morale, so they could save me. 

After several agonizing minutes, the monster landed in its cave, crushing me as it landed. I grunted in pain, unable to prevent it from hearing. I was thrown into what looked like a giant birdcage, the door locking automatically behind me. I whimpered, but I was able to heal my wounds enough that I was no longer bleeding. My shoulders were still in excruciating pain, but I wasn’t in danger of dying from it. I willed my clothes to mend themselves, watching the beast. It let out the loudest roar yet, this time it came in the form of words. 

“ _ The prince is mine! _ ” As soon as the words were uttered, the colorful land turned into shades of black. The only color that remained was the red of fresh spilt blood. 


	2. Alone if Not for Imagination

“R-Ro?” Virgil Prince knocked on his big brother’s door nervously. He was scared. Dad was drunk again. When there was no reply, he went in anyway. Virgil whispered for his brother again, but the room was empty. There was no sign of the seven year old boy anywhere. The bed was empty. Roman was gone. His father stomped past the door and saw him standing there. He let out a growl as he turned and went into the room. Virgil cringed away from the man. 

* * *

At night, Virgil cried himself to sleep. “I want Roman,” he whispered. He just wanted his older brother back. 

_ “It’s ok V, I’m here.” _

Virgil sat up with a start, looking around frantically for Roman.  _ Roman is gone, _ he told himself. But it happened again. Every time he pleaded with the air to give him his brother back, he could hear him, a small voice, barely audible over the wind. Eventually he would have conversations with him. 

“Roman,” he whimpered. 

_ “I’m here Virge.” _

“I’m scared.”

_ “I know. But it’ll be okay.” _

“How?”

_ “I don’t know yet,” _ the quiet voice admitted. Virgil choked back a sob. He just wanted Roman to be there, to hold him. To hug his fears away. But it had been a year. Roman wasn’t coming back. If he was, he would have by now. 

Just as Virgil thought this, a safe, comforting presence enveloped him. A love he’d only felt from Roman, wrapping around him in a hug. He longed for the familiar weight of Roman’s arms, instead he only got a light warmth where they should have been. 

It went that way for a while. Virgil would talk to the Voice, and was safe when he felt its presence. It was a comfort in his pain and fear. A fear that no one, especially not a child, should have to feel. Ever. 

It was a couple years after Roman left that it first happened. Virgil would see flashes, from the corner of his eye. A boy in a white, royal suit. He saw Princey everywhere. And he almost always accompanied the Voice. 

* * *

His father wasn’t home. Which was good, it meant he was safe for a little bit. “Princey?” He called, wanting to see if the mysterious boy was nearby. 

_ “Hey Virgil,” _ he heard the voice before he saw its owner. Princey was just around the corner to the hall. Virgil hurried over to him, reaching out to grab his arm before he could disappear. His hand just grasped empty air, despite Princey’s arm being right there. 

“Wha?”

_ “You can’t touch me. I’m not really here, not physically,”  _ Princey’s voice was sad. Virgil nodded, not fully understanding. 

“We can still hang out though, right? And play?” He forced away his hope, expecting a no. 

_ “Of course. What would you like to play?” _ Princey grinned. Virgil looked up, shock and glee playing across his face. 

“Princes and dragons!” It was Roman’s favorite game. And Virgil usually got to play the prince. He didn’t notice the hesitation on Princey’s face as he nodded. 

* * *

Princey came all the time, playing whatever Virgil wanted. Sometimes they just say and talked. Sometimes he explained how to take care of a wound properly. It really varied depending on the day. He became Virgil’s best friend. 

Dad didn’t like it. He constantly punished Virgil for playing with an imaginary friend. 

Roman is dead. 

He’s never coming back. 

He’s gone. 

Dead. 

Never. 

Gone. 

These three words ripped into Virgil’s heart, but he slowly started to believe them. As he did, Princey showed up less and less. Virgil grew less and less happy. By the time he was eleven, Princey stopped showing up at all. And the Voice never came back after Princey left. Virgil was completely alone. 


	3. A Cry for Help

Virgil’s footsteps echoed in the empty hall. At least that what he told himself. The second set of footsteps was just an echo. The tingling on the back of his neck was just from the cold. The uneasiness in his chest was just residual anxiety from his test earlier. The shadow behind him was his own, just distorted because of the flickering lights. 

Yeah he didn’t believe a word of that. As his heart rate picked up speed, so did his footsteps. 

So did his stalker. 

It had been a few weeks. He tried to convince himself he was making it up, or imagining things. He tried to convince himself he was being irrational and paranoid. He told himself every day that he was just as alone as the day before. 

But if he wasn’t alone yesterday, he certainly wasn’t alone today. Not even in a seemingly empty hallway. He wanted to take off running. He forced himself to slow to a walk. 

_ “Princey,” _ Virgil was shocked. The voice.... he knew that voice. 

“Ro-Roman?” He froze. Roman’s voice sounded strained, as if he was in pain. 

* * *

_ “You’ll be okay Princey,” Roman would say. “We won’t be here forever.” _

_ “Come on Princey, let’s play a game. You go hide, them I’ll come find you,” Virgil had hidden, and when Roman found him, he was bruised. And Virgil knew their dad had found Roman first.  _

_ “Princey, I need you to breathe for me. 4-7-8, you can do it. I’m right here,” Roman would say to sooth Virgil when he was panicking.  _

* * *

Roman always called him Princey. It was his special name. No one else got to call him that. And then after Roman left... Virgil had imagined him. Princey, his imaginary friend. A pretend Roman, that way he wouldn’t feel so alone. Virgil slowly turned around. He saw Roman, standing about ten feet away from him. In a white royal suit, the same one Princey always wore when he was a kid. Virgil caught his breath when he saw how much pain his brother had to be in. Roman had bruises all over his face. His chest was bleeding and his suit stained red. His left arm bent at an odd angle that wasn’t possible for human bone. And his right eye was swollen shut. He was clearly unable to stand on his right leg, despite the large gash in his left shin. 

“R-Ro.. what... what happened to you?” 

_ “Help,” _ Roman gasped out, his body disintegrating before Virgil’s eyes. The dust seemed to vanish as soon as it formed. 

“No!” Virgil screamed. He lunged for his brother, but instead of grabbing him, holding him in reality, Virgil’s hand burst through, sending more of Roman’s body into nothingness. Roman screamed in pain, his face contorting with agony. It was as if he were being burned alive from the inside out his body disintegrated completely, not leaving so much as a speck of dust behind. A small, crumpled up paper drifted down to the floor where Roman stood. 

_ Get me out of here _ . 

The note disintegrated as Virgil read it. “Where are you Roman?” 

A choked sob echoed from the classroom. Virgil silently looked through the open door, only to see Logan Sanders crying. Logan never cried. He also never smiled. He never got angry. Virgil had never seen him show any emotion. And here he was, sobbing on the floor in the math classroom. 

“Logan?” Virgil hated how his voice quivered. Logan’s head snapped up. He tried to stuff down the tears, but he couldn’t. 

“Patton,” Logan sobbed. 

“Who’s Patton?” Virgil sat next to the distraught boy. 

“My baby brother. He... he disappeared when we were little. It’s why I don’t show emotion. I don’t want to hurt anymore.”

“Oh Lo,” Virgil hugged him, rubbing his back gently. “I know it hurts and it always will. Hell, I still cry myself to sleep over it.”

“You lost a brother?”

“Yeah... Roman... I don’t talk about him much.”

“You don’t talk about anything much,” Logan laughed a bit through his tears. 

“Yeah well... when you’re afraid for your life, you shut up and don’t make yourself the center of attention,” Virgil shrugged. 

“Your dad?”

Virgil nodded silently. He didn’t want to get in trouble. His dad wasn’t even there, and he was still terrified. 

* * *

_ Virgil cowered in fear as his father struck him across the face with a belt. This was the angriest he’d ever seen him.  _

**_I shouldn’t have spoken. I knew he’d get mad. Shut up and don’t make yourself the center of attention. That’s what Dad wants_ ** _. He told himself this. It was his fault. If he could just learn to stop talking so much, everything would be easier. His dad grabbed him by the throat, pinning him to the wall.  _

_ “If I  _ **_ever_ ** _ hear your voice again, you won’t have a voice to use anymore,” his dad hissed. “Understand?” He squeezed Virgil’s neck. Virgil couldn’t breathe. He nodded quickly, biting back a sob of fear.  _

* * *

Virgil hadn’t spoken since that day. “It’s been five years since I spoke. I... I’m not supposed to,” be chuckled dryly. “Look at that. I’m probably the only college freshman who still follows my dad’s rules.”

“Nah,” Logan shook his head. “We’re the only two. Except in my case it’s about studying and homework. If I don’t pass with at least a 4.0 GPA, he won’t help me pay for college. And I would have to pay him back for every penny he’s put into my education.”

“That’s messed up,” Virgil shook his head. “I guess we both have crappy dads, huh?” 

“I guess so,” they were silent for a few minutes. 

“Patton is in trouble,” Logan was the first to break it. “He’s trapped somewhere, not in this dimension. He used to always go on and on about the fairy tale world. I think that’s where he is. But the only way to get there is through dreaming. You probably think I’m crazy. Am I crazy?”

“If you are, then so am I. Because I believe you.” The two of them made plans to meet at Logan’s house that night. They both laid down on the king sized bed, falling asleep almost instantly. When they opened their eyes, everything was in shades of black and white. Clearly they were in a castle of some kind, but they didn’t know where. 

And they didn’t know why the only thing that seemed to have any color was the pool of blood beneath their feet. 


	4. Into Death

Roman bit his tongue to keep from crying out as the grey whip cracked along his back. He slumped against a black post in front of him. He was really getting tired of this colorless world. And red  _ definitely  _ wasn’t his favorite anymore. He wanted to see purple again. To find a stray violet growing on the side of the road. To pick it and bring it home to Virgil. To hug his brother close and say everything was going to be okay. 

But he couldn’t do that. He couldn’t do any of that. Because he was chained to a pole and being beaten by a soldier that he’d created to help him fight. Everything he’d created, turned against him. He flinched as he was struck again, the metal beads that had been sewn to the whip dug into his flesh. There wasn’t even any reason for the torture, the dragon witch simply thought it was fun, to see him broken and bleeding when he was thrown into the arena to fight. 

He didn’t know who the other boy was. He didn’t know anything about him. Only that he was just as terrified and trapped as Roman. Not that Roman would let on that he was at all scared. First he had to be strong for Virgil, now he had the other boy. He always had someone that he needed to protect but couldn’t. He failed, every time. And the only way for their fight to be over is for one of them to incapacitate the other. So Roman always pretended to be knocked out. He couldn’t bring himself to touch this kid. He had to be Virgil’s age or younger. 

_ Dammit Roman, you’re trapped here. He can’t get to you. You will never see your brother again so just stop it. It’s been two years since you asked him for help.  _

As much as he wanted to stop caring, because then it might hurt less, he couldn’t bring himself to not care for Virgil. 

When the door slammed open, he didn’t even look up. It would just be a new soldier to replace the old one, who would find new ways to slowly kill Roman. 

“Ro?” The soft voice made him look up, unable to stop himself from hoping

* * *

Virgil dragged Logan in the direction of the blood, hoping on all things holy that Roman would be okay. The blood split in two different directions, and Logan went left whereas Virgil went right. When he saw a door painted completely red, he knew he’d found the right spot. He didn’t even knock, he just kicked the door in. The sight he was met with was Roman, his back a solid sheen of red. He was chained to a post, the only reason he was still upright.

“Ro?” Virgil practically whispered. Roman looked up, hope and fear splayed across his face. 

“Princey,” Roman’s voice was barely audible, as though speaking would make Virgil disappear. Looking at Roman’s state, Virgil couldn’t be sure how many times that had happened. 

“I’m here, Ro,” Virgil hurried to his brother’s side. “I’m real.”

Roman’s body sagged as tears stained his cheeks. “You came.”

“I came,” Virgil nodded. “And I’m gonna get you home, okay? We’re going home.”

Roman shook his head, fear clouding his expression. Virgil recognized the look as one he’d seem whenever their dad drank. Virgil tucked a strand of hair behind Roman’s ear. “Not to him, I promise. He kicked me out on my sixteenth birthday. I have an apartment now.” 

The soldier glared at Virgil, bring down the whip against his face. Virgil let the momentum of the strike push his head to the side, causing the impact to be less harsh. Something he’d learned from his dad. Roman flinched at the red that now stained Virgil’s cheek. 

Virgil swiftly picked the lock, helping Roman to the floor. He threw the heavy shackle at the guard. Virgil helped his brother to his feet, leading him out the door. He got Roman through the doorway, but a wall seemed to appear when he tried to step through, burning when he touched it. 

“One in, one out,” the guard snarled, snapping the shackles around Virgil’s wrists. The cold metal seemed to freeze his blood. He looked up, seeing Roman pounding on the invisible wall. He could see his brother scream his name, but couldn’t hear. 

“I love you Ro,” he whispered, knowing it would be his last chance to say it out loud he heard the distinct sound of a sword being unsheathed. Virgil braced himself, never letting his gaze leave his brother as the sword struck between his shoulder blades, slicing through his heart. He used his last ounce of lie to sign 'I love you.' The last thing he saw was Roman signing it back. 

* * *

Logan didn’t like the idea of leaving Virgil, but he knew he didn’t have a choice. He followed the trail of blood, fear clawing at his heart. Logan stopped cold when he saw Patton. He was chained to a wall, shaking and sobbing. The walk had two inch spikes on it, that dig into his flesh whenever he moved. And spiders the size of basketballs crawled around the room and across the terrified boy. Logan shuddered at the sight. But if his studies were right, in order to free his baby brother, he would have to take his place. 

Logan swallowed and he squared his shoulders and walked down the steps into the pit. He would get Patton out if it was the last thing he did. Which it very well could be. But he wasn’t going to dwell on that. 

“Patton!” He called. The boy’s eyes snapped open, locking in on his big brother. 

“L-Logan?” Patton hardly dared believe it was real. 

“It’s me Pat. It’s Lo.”

“No!” Patton screamed. “Don’t come any closer!” Logan froze. “Why not?”

“The spiders are poison. You can’t touch them.”

“They’re touching you.”

Patton shuddered. “Don’t remind me.”

A spider crawled over him, it’s fuzzy legs brushing against his face. A shriek of fear ripped from his throat. At the outcry, the spiders all turned toward Patton, who started shaking and sobbing even harder. His chest heaved as he struggled to get a breath through his panic 

“Patton look at me. Focus on my voice,” Logan spoke as loudly as he dared. “Breath in one two three four. Hold it one two three four five six seven. Breathe out one two three four five six seven eight,” He cycled through the breathing pattern four times, keeping his eyes on his brother. 

He didn’t see the spider that crawled up behind him. He was so focused on helping Patton that he didn’t feel it climb his back until it was too late. The spider sank its fangs into the back of his neck. Pain shot through him and a weight seemed to drop on his heart. Patton screamed. It didn’t take a genius IQ for Logan to know what it did. 

He couldn’t go back. 

And he couldn’t save Patton. 

He stumbled back, afraid. And then he fell. Down. And down. And down. Until he crashed into a pool of water. The water had a salt flavor similar to the ocean. Logan could still breathe, but he water burned his lungs with every breath. The more he tried to swim up the more he was dragged deeper. Maybe he finally would figure out what exactly was at the bottom of the ocean. 


	5. The End

I ran my hand over the smooth stone, letting my fingers trace the names carved into the surface. 

Logan Sanders. 

Patton Sanders. 

Virgil Prince. 

I found out who Logan and Patton were a few days after I got back. Virgil’s body was found in bed with Logan’s, and I found out about Patton because I couldn’t understand why he would go into the nightmare. It was because his brother. Patton.The boy I failed to protect. The boy I couldn’t save. His body had never turned up. 

Even though Logan wasn’t actually buried with Virgil, I had carved the Sanders’s names into the stone. I sat on the grass in front of it, tears spilling from my eyes for the first time since I’d come back. 

“I’m sorry Princey.” I didn’t plan on leaving the cemetery. 


End file.
